by
Tracy Shawn
Fear and malice of the older woman has a long and ugly history. In fact, the origin of the word hag, which has often been used as an insult describing an older woman, originates from the old English word for witch. And the image of the old crone in fairy tales and folklore is often depicted as bitter, churlish, and scary. Throughout history, older women have been considered dangerous and accusations of witchcraft against what society called hags and crones is thousands of years old.
Part of how this came to be might be because the old woman can be said to represent darkness, since she is past her reproductive years and closer to death. And most likely, too, the disgust—which still exists today—that is aimed at the older woman represents the fear of her power. After all, the older woman is imbued with knowledge, wisdom, and maturity, which, to the very least, raises the hackles of our patriarchal system.
And now here we are in the twenty-first century, where older women often complain about being pushed aside, are made to feel as if they aren’t good enough if they don’t look “good” enough (which is code for young), are worried that they may even lose out on job opportunities—not to mention potential love interests—if they don’t get some “work” done. Our culture’s ongoing disdain for the older woman seems to be taking on a whole other level now that more and more women are buying into what they consider the normalized aging process, which includes injectables, lifts, laser treatments, and a complete smorgasbord of nips and tucks.
I have no issue with any individual woman who makes these choices. It’s her body, her face, her life. In fact, more power to her if it truly makes her happy and empowered. And, if I’m being truthful, I don’t particularly like the look of my sagging neck, crumbly jawline, or crepe-paper arms. But I’ve come to accept that, yes, I’ve aged—I’m now in my sixties—and my skin is only going to continue to weather, my body droop, and my eyes dim throughout years. Do I want to waste my last couple of decades or so spending time, money, and energy on my looks? I say no.
What I want to do is continue to write, continue to connect with others, continue to appreciate my life. I want to show the world who I truly am: an old lady—and, yes, you may call me a crone—who isn’t afraid to show the indents of worry between her brows, the late-night reading shadows of sleep deprivation under her baggy eyes, the laugh lines around her mouth. I want people to know that they, too, are safe to be themselves. So, I will proudly wear my wrinkles. If it bothers others, that is no concern of mine, as I will continue to stay as healthy as possible through the time-proven habits of exercise and a balanced diet. I only hope that I gain more smile lines than frown impressions, more joyful creases than doubtful furrows. And lastly, I only hope, too, that we can all feel free to celebrate our unique selves, both inside and out, no matter what stage of life we are in.
Award-winning author Tracy Shawn has published two novels: The Grace of Crows and Floating Underwater. Her short stories have appeared in Literary Brushstrokes, Psychology Tomorrow Magazine, and Steel House Review Literary Journal. Two of her poems were published in the poetry anthology Wounds I Healed: The Poetry of Strong Women. Ms. Shawn has written numerous articles and is currently working on her third novel.
